Looking Up.

Hello!

I am extremely grateful to be writing this post in a MUCH happier state of mind than my last one. But it’s those difficult days that make good ones so much more meaningful, right?

For over 15 years I have tried what seems like every medication out there to relieve various symptoms or the chronic pain – mostly to no avail. My fellow spoonies can attest that with any new medicine the side effects are generally worse than the original symptom you’re trying to fix! It’s a very emotionally draining process of getting your hopes up for a new medicine to just have it not work, or to make symptoms even worse! BUT! I can say with pleasure that for once in my life, I am now on a medication that helps!!! Not only does it help, but it has made a HUGE difference in my daily life – such an unbelievably huge answer prayer.

Though there is a small caveat – the fact that this medicine works means I get to add another chronic ailment to my list: RLS. Restless Leg Syndrome (RLS) is a very irritating condition that most people have actually heard of, that is characteristically known for a strong urge to move your legs (or arms as well, in lovely severe cases such as mine) to relieve discomfort/pain that get worse with inactivity or around bedtime. This is why it’s so hard for me to travel!! It’s such a relief to finally have an answer, but an even bigger relief to have a medicine that helps!!! I’m sleeping better than I can ever remember, and I have energy for the first time since I can remember, and the medicine is helping my nerves chill out.

While unfortunately I cannot say it’s helping with the daily pain I have, it’s made a world of difference even still. At this point I will take anything I can get! It’s really hard to describe how I feel now. Honestly, I’ve never really had much energy, so now that I have little spurts of it, I don’t know what to do with myself! Waking up every morning used to be a miserable process of forcing myself to get out of bed despite the fact that I felt like I hadn’t slept for a week. But now I wake up with enough energy to pop out of bed and greet the day – feeling like I have actually slept! Granted my new abundance of energy is probably equivalent to a healthy person’s slow day, but it’s still a dramatic improvement for me! Now my new battle is moderation! It’s so hard now that I have some energy to not go out and do a bunch of things which will lead to being burnt out!

This situation has confirmed yet again, that you are your biggest advocate!! I am SO blessed to have a doctor in town who is willing to help me try new things if it will bring some relief, and she was open to prescribing this medicine. But I had to ask for it! I was the one who had to tell her I thought I had RLS! It is strange to me that for all these years no doctors have ever mentioned it either. It may seem a small thing to have a new medicine, especially one that isn’t a miracle pill that magically takes away all pain and exhaustion….but it’s made my life, already just in the week I’ve taken it, SO much more bearable. My mom has always told me (and she’s right, as moms usually are) that my biggest advocate will always be me, and that’s true for anyone! Whether it’s medically, or in a situation with friends or work, or whatever life circumstance – it’s okay to stick up for yourself and be your own advocate, chances are it will be worth it!