Tonight was my first Vertical of the semester. AKA my favorite time of the week!!!
Tonight was simply amazing. And really just refreshing. I'm starting to think back on my college years (being senior year and all..yay!) and I have seen quite a pattern of God just completely shattering my plans. Not just slightly chipping away little bits, or modifying them...completely shattering them. And I'm continually learning and realizing that I am not in control. And this semester is apparently going to be no different. The past couple weeks I have discovered and been attempting to deal with a situation that is SO completely over my head. I have no idea how to deal. The past couple weeks I've just been feeling really down, and allowing Satan to get the best of my complete loss of what to do, to make me feel like I am just drowning in this situation. I don't know what to do, what to say, how to act, how to deal, how it changes things. It's just an issue that is so much bigger than I am, or ever will be.
But tonight I got to take a step back from it. I was given the opportunity to step away from that, and my stresses with school, and everything else going on in this crazy thing we call life, and just bring it back to where it needs to be. Me and God.
Tonight at Vertical during worship I just allowed myself to be completely engulfed in it. Forget everything around me, everything going on, and just run into God's arms and be comforted and filled with His peace. All the songs were about God being stronger than anything, and if He is for us what in the world could be against us. And we ended the night with On Christ the Solid Rock I Stand. It was like the whole evening was designed and tailored for the message I needed to hear most.
I may not be able to handle or comprehend the current situation, or really anything that comes my way in life. But God can. He is SO. MUCH. BIGGER. A message that sounds really simple, and super easy to say...but hard to truly live. As much as I love having control, I am constantly being convicted to let go, and let God.
So tonight was renewal for me. It was refreshment and being put back in my place and knowing that this situation is, and always has been, in His hands. I don't have to know what to do, or how to act. I just need to put all my trust in Him, and let Him do it for me.
I'm bringin' it back.
Monday, September 19, 2011
Tuesday, September 6, 2011
Closing Chapters.
As exciting as a new chapter in life is, every chapter must have it's end. And unfortunately that time has come in regards to my involvement with KXA.
As I sit here, I am now officially an Early Alum of Kappa Chi Alpha, a group that has totally transformed my time at Baylor, and had such an effect on who I am. I met one of my best friends in KXA. I have had SO many fun, and amazing experiences that just would not and could not be fully explained in this little blog post.
It is really bittersweet at this point. I can't think of a Baylor experience I have had without KXA being a part of it in some way or another. Those girls have been such an incredible support system for me in some of the hardest times in my life. And they were there to celebrate my victories as well. I will truly treasure every memory I have with each of them, and still hope that I can grow those friendships even though I won't see them as often.
This decision is definitely the closing of one chapter, but it's also the very beginning of a new one. Graduate school is next on my list, and if I want to get in, my grades and academics need to be my top priority...which is why I made the hard decision to not participate in KXA anymore.
Sorry if this post doesn't really make sense...this week has been emotionally exhausting, and with this piece of news my emotions are even more all over the page. But I know that God absolutely had a reason and purpose for me being in KXA, and there is a reason that is not part of His plan for me this year...and I am excited to see where He leads.
As I sit here, I am now officially an Early Alum of Kappa Chi Alpha, a group that has totally transformed my time at Baylor, and had such an effect on who I am. I met one of my best friends in KXA. I have had SO many fun, and amazing experiences that just would not and could not be fully explained in this little blog post.
It is really bittersweet at this point. I can't think of a Baylor experience I have had without KXA being a part of it in some way or another. Those girls have been such an incredible support system for me in some of the hardest times in my life. And they were there to celebrate my victories as well. I will truly treasure every memory I have with each of them, and still hope that I can grow those friendships even though I won't see them as often.
This decision is definitely the closing of one chapter, but it's also the very beginning of a new one. Graduate school is next on my list, and if I want to get in, my grades and academics need to be my top priority...which is why I made the hard decision to not participate in KXA anymore.
Sorry if this post doesn't really make sense...this week has been emotionally exhausting, and with this piece of news my emotions are even more all over the page. But I know that God absolutely had a reason and purpose for me being in KXA, and there is a reason that is not part of His plan for me this year...and I am excited to see where He leads.
Saturday, August 20, 2011
SCHOOL!!!!
Ha, needless to say I am so excited about school starting. Even though I spent 10 weeks of my summer taking classes and have only had a couple weeks to actually do nothing, I can't wait to start back on Monday. Being my senior year I'm actually taking classes that have to do with my major (what a concept!) so I am ready to get started :)
I am finally back in my apartment, and after a day of moving in last minute stuff and having almost everything that could break break, night has fallen and I don't really know what to do with myself! Hence, a new blog post for you fine people who read this!
Anyone who knows me knows how anal I am about planning. For example. my closest friends know one of the worst crimes anyone could possibly commit against me is to touch my calendar, whether it's adding or erasing something. So, with my nothing-to-do night I have successfully completed my calendar for the month, printed out my syllabi, and written everything down for the semester in my planner. For the two classes that have released their info. Frustrating, with 7 classes. Sigh. I guess not everyone is as eager to plan out their semesters as I am...so until Monday I must wait.
In the meantime I get to sit in my really hot apartment. The maintenance people have come by twice today to look at it and both times have said everything is fine. Obviously not, because it's still at least in the 80s in here, when the thermostat is set to below 70. Not only is it not cooling, but right about now it's making a noise so horrific I fear it will explode at any minute. But apparently nothing is wrong!
Welp, that's about all I have right now. So to all my fellow classmates - happy start of classes!
I am finally back in my apartment, and after a day of moving in last minute stuff and having almost everything that could break break, night has fallen and I don't really know what to do with myself! Hence, a new blog post for you fine people who read this!
Anyone who knows me knows how anal I am about planning. For example. my closest friends know one of the worst crimes anyone could possibly commit against me is to touch my calendar, whether it's adding or erasing something. So, with my nothing-to-do night I have successfully completed my calendar for the month, printed out my syllabi, and written everything down for the semester in my planner. For the two classes that have released their info. Frustrating, with 7 classes. Sigh. I guess not everyone is as eager to plan out their semesters as I am...so until Monday I must wait.
In the meantime I get to sit in my really hot apartment. The maintenance people have come by twice today to look at it and both times have said everything is fine. Obviously not, because it's still at least in the 80s in here, when the thermostat is set to below 70. Not only is it not cooling, but right about now it's making a noise so horrific I fear it will explode at any minute. But apparently nothing is wrong!
Welp, that's about all I have right now. So to all my fellow classmates - happy start of classes!
Sunday, July 31, 2011
Powerful moments.
Today after the sermon, during the response time, I witness an extremely precious and powerful moment that was literally almost bringing me to tears.
Pastor Brian had just finished his second part in his current series about the Holy Spirit, which is so amazing. I'll have to post my notes so far on it at some point because I know I'm learning a lot through it, and hopefully I can share what I've learned and maybe teach others something as well. Anyways...so it was during the response time when people are invited to come up to the stairs at the front and pray if they need to and the following scenario was played out....
A few weeks ago a member of our college group lost his father, and obviously is going through some rough times right now, as is his whole family. He went up to the front and knelt down at the altar to pray. Then seconds later two of his great friends (also great men in our college ministry) knelt down beside him, laid hands on him, and they all prayed together. It was SUCH a precious, yet crazy powerful moment. Through everything going on in all 3 of their lives...it all stopped right there. The world just froze, and they were all united there through prayer.
I don't really know how to adequately describe the feeling I got from watching that. But y'all, prayer is powerful. God is powerful. He can come through ANY situation, anything going on in life, get 3 young guys in different situations and bring them together in an incredible moment of prayer and fellowship with Him.
It was a moment I won't soon forget. And I think sometimes we so often (we meaning me included FOR SURE) get so caught up in the day-to-day business and that prayer is a part of it and it just becomes too common. We forget that we are talking to GOD! We get to talk directly to the Creator of the entire universe!!! It is such a powerful thing and is life changing, and that is something we should never take for granted.
Pastor Brian had just finished his second part in his current series about the Holy Spirit, which is so amazing. I'll have to post my notes so far on it at some point because I know I'm learning a lot through it, and hopefully I can share what I've learned and maybe teach others something as well. Anyways...so it was during the response time when people are invited to come up to the stairs at the front and pray if they need to and the following scenario was played out....
A few weeks ago a member of our college group lost his father, and obviously is going through some rough times right now, as is his whole family. He went up to the front and knelt down at the altar to pray. Then seconds later two of his great friends (also great men in our college ministry) knelt down beside him, laid hands on him, and they all prayed together. It was SUCH a precious, yet crazy powerful moment. Through everything going on in all 3 of their lives...it all stopped right there. The world just froze, and they were all united there through prayer.
I don't really know how to adequately describe the feeling I got from watching that. But y'all, prayer is powerful. God is powerful. He can come through ANY situation, anything going on in life, get 3 young guys in different situations and bring them together in an incredible moment of prayer and fellowship with Him.
It was a moment I won't soon forget. And I think sometimes we so often (we meaning me included FOR SURE) get so caught up in the day-to-day business and that prayer is a part of it and it just becomes too common. We forget that we are talking to GOD! We get to talk directly to the Creator of the entire universe!!! It is such a powerful thing and is life changing, and that is something we should never take for granted.
Technlogy.
So, not many of you know this unless you've been in my car, but for about the past year or so I've had a pedal extension on my accelerator. It makes it so much easier for me to drive because I don't have to extend my leg as far, and I can basically use it while keeping my foot on the floor so I don't keep muscles flexed for long periods. It has become increasingly apparent in the last few months that I'm having a lot of trouble using the brake, which was just like any other car. Sitting at long red lights was becoming a painful problem, and it seems that the time has come to get an extension on my brake.
I tried to hold off as long as I could, because to me getting something like this done is just another thing on the list of "normal" things I can't do. But with technology these days and all the amazing stuff that's out there now, I can do "normal" things...just a little differently! So yesterday my dad and I went to get my extension on, and it is HEAVENLY!! This is going to allow me to drive for who knows how much longer now! Using the pedals are SO much easier now, and it doesn't hurt anymore! Always good. Posted below is a picture of it for you visual people.
Anyway, just thought I'd update about that. It's pretty cool all the crazy things they can do now to accommodate for things like this.
I tried to hold off as long as I could, because to me getting something like this done is just another thing on the list of "normal" things I can't do. But with technology these days and all the amazing stuff that's out there now, I can do "normal" things...just a little differently! So yesterday my dad and I went to get my extension on, and it is HEAVENLY!! This is going to allow me to drive for who knows how much longer now! Using the pedals are SO much easier now, and it doesn't hurt anymore! Always good. Posted below is a picture of it for you visual people.
Anyway, just thought I'd update about that. It's pretty cool all the crazy things they can do now to accommodate for things like this.
Tuesday, July 12, 2011
Craft Day!
Anyone who knows me well knows that I definitely do NOT consider myself a crafty or creative person. I'm super left-brained and overanalyze everything way too much to find creative things a stress relief...in fact, they actually tend to stress me out throughout the process, but after it's finished I love it! Haha
All this to say, today my mom and I had a craft day! For Christmas this past year, my roommate at the time gave me the first picture below. It is SO cute and I absolutely love it!! We were going to hang it above my bed at home, but it's too small on its own. So my mom had the great idea to make two more and hang all three of them! So we made the last two! All in all it was a really fun day. Despite my craziness of needing everything to match and be perfect, we had a great time and I wanted to share with you our amazing (in my opinion) project!!
(**Excuse the not super awesome picture quality, they were taken with my phone**)
All this to say, today my mom and I had a craft day! For Christmas this past year, my roommate at the time gave me the first picture below. It is SO cute and I absolutely love it!! We were going to hang it above my bed at home, but it's too small on its own. So my mom had the great idea to make two more and hang all three of them! So we made the last two! All in all it was a really fun day. Despite my craziness of needing everything to match and be perfect, we had a great time and I wanted to share with you our amazing (in my opinion) project!!
(**Excuse the not super awesome picture quality, they were taken with my phone**)
Wednesday, May 18, 2011
Dating.
Long time no...blog? Read? Write? Whatever the case, it's nice to blog again. The past month or so since my last post has just been a whirlwind of finals, packing, goodbyes, and insanity.
This morning I took my GRE, and beasted it!!! SUCH a load of. I realize I'm not going to grad school for another 1.5-2 years, but taking it now was my best option and was definitely worth it. So I now can relish in the next 2 weeks of my "summer" before summer school starts and will last until about 2 weeks before the fall semester begins. I'm terrified/exciting/anxious/intrigued by my summer school classes (Anatomy I & II). I have heard HORROR stories about how hard it is and what a GPA killer it can be (which I totally can't afford), thus I am taking it this summer when it's all I have to worry about.
Health wise there isn't really much to say. I got my brace a couple weeks ago that I'm supposed to be wearing most of the time, or really whenever I feel like I need it. It's really helpful, and makes walking slightly easier in a way (and harder at the same time) and makes the pain less....I just have to suck it up now that summer is here and people can see it when I wear shorts.
What really has been on my heart lately is dating. Please don't tune me out just yet! I know many people might be thinking "Ugh, typical girl...wants to talk about dating and boys." I promise this will be worth while...well, at least I hope so. It was for me at least. Obviously dating is on everyone's mind at some point, and to some degree. I feel like recently it's been on mine more than usual, whether it's in reference to my life or others talking to me about their relationships. Two Sundays ago my pastor started a new series that is going from Mother's Day to Father's Day called The Game of Life...each Sunday talking about an important issue. In fact, the last few months of last year he allowed us to text/email/call/write in things that we wanted to be talked about, and this series is a mash up and compilation of many of those issues - which is pretty legit if you ask me.
I bet you've guessed it by now, but this past Sunday he talked about dating. Questions about dating to be more specific. It was a really great message, and I know that several of my friends have asked me about it so I'm posting my notes and a few of my personal insights on here - here's hoping it helps someone else like it did me.
Q: Is dating biblical?
A: The biblical model is courtship.
Song of Solomon 1:7
Standards were extremely high
Families were involved
Access was conditional
Song 2:15
Q: What should I look for in a husband/wife?
A: Someone who loves AND fears the Lord
Isaiah 11:2
Being a girl, I wrote down what he said specifically about guys. He said there are 3 extremely important things to look for when asking yourself if a certain guy is "the one."
A: Accept your circumstances
Phil 4:11
A: Adopt God's standards
1 Thes 4:3
- A really interesting insight into this verse that I never knew before - the word "holy" in this verse is translated from the word literally meaning fine china. When is fine china used?? For special occasions. God's will is for us to be holy. To be fine china. YOU are made SPECIAL. Not for everyday use. You're what is brought out for special events and big celebrations.
A: Utilize your freedom
1 Cor 7:32-34
This was a really great message on dating. Our society casts a negative light on being single sometimes, which is so not the case. Marriage is an incredible, Christ breathed thing and is meant to be enjoyed and that's how God planned it. But don't throw away opportunities and chances to grow and really live for Christ while you're single. When you're single all you have to worry about is serving Christ and growing your relationship with Him. Once you're married, as the last verse reference states you have someone else to worry about as well. Don't let single life slip by. That was one thing I was definitely convicted about. Yes, at times there may be a guy I like and yes, there will be times when it will drive me nuts wondering if he likes me and if we'll end up together and all those questions that come along with it. But I would HATE to not have utilized my freedom, and missed out on being all I can be when it comes to my walk.
This morning I took my GRE, and beasted it!!! SUCH a load of. I realize I'm not going to grad school for another 1.5-2 years, but taking it now was my best option and was definitely worth it. So I now can relish in the next 2 weeks of my "summer" before summer school starts and will last until about 2 weeks before the fall semester begins. I'm terrified/exciting/anxious/intrigued by my summer school classes (Anatomy I & II). I have heard HORROR stories about how hard it is and what a GPA killer it can be (which I totally can't afford), thus I am taking it this summer when it's all I have to worry about.
Health wise there isn't really much to say. I got my brace a couple weeks ago that I'm supposed to be wearing most of the time, or really whenever I feel like I need it. It's really helpful, and makes walking slightly easier in a way (and harder at the same time) and makes the pain less....I just have to suck it up now that summer is here and people can see it when I wear shorts.
What really has been on my heart lately is dating. Please don't tune me out just yet! I know many people might be thinking "Ugh, typical girl...wants to talk about dating and boys." I promise this will be worth while...well, at least I hope so. It was for me at least. Obviously dating is on everyone's mind at some point, and to some degree. I feel like recently it's been on mine more than usual, whether it's in reference to my life or others talking to me about their relationships. Two Sundays ago my pastor started a new series that is going from Mother's Day to Father's Day called The Game of Life...each Sunday talking about an important issue. In fact, the last few months of last year he allowed us to text/email/call/write in things that we wanted to be talked about, and this series is a mash up and compilation of many of those issues - which is pretty legit if you ask me.
I bet you've guessed it by now, but this past Sunday he talked about dating. Questions about dating to be more specific. It was a really great message, and I know that several of my friends have asked me about it so I'm posting my notes and a few of my personal insights on here - here's hoping it helps someone else like it did me.
Q: Is dating biblical?
A: The biblical model is courtship.
Song of Solomon 1:7
Standards were extremely high
Families were involved
Access was conditional
Song 2:15
Q: What should I look for in a husband/wife?
A: Someone who loves AND fears the Lord
Isaiah 11:2
Being a girl, I wrote down what he said specifically about guys. He said there are 3 extremely important things to look for when asking yourself if a certain guy is "the one."
- How does he spend his money? (Note: it's not HOW much money he has, but how he spends what he does have)
- What entertains him?? (Are they dirty jokes and crude movies or off-color humor)
- Watch him lose. Watching how a guy loses is extremely relevant in his behavior with the rest of life. If he punches things and gets really angry when he loses - what's to say you won't be behind his fist one day?
- How does she dress? There's a way to look beautiful without accentuating certain parts or being immodest.
- How does she talk about other people? Does she gossip incessantly and always put others down, or does she always speak encouragingly about others?
- How does she act when she doesn't get her way?
A: Accept your circumstances
Phil 4:11
A: Adopt God's standards
1 Thes 4:3
- A really interesting insight into this verse that I never knew before - the word "holy" in this verse is translated from the word literally meaning fine china. When is fine china used?? For special occasions. God's will is for us to be holy. To be fine china. YOU are made SPECIAL. Not for everyday use. You're what is brought out for special events and big celebrations.
A: Utilize your freedom
1 Cor 7:32-34
This was a really great message on dating. Our society casts a negative light on being single sometimes, which is so not the case. Marriage is an incredible, Christ breathed thing and is meant to be enjoyed and that's how God planned it. But don't throw away opportunities and chances to grow and really live for Christ while you're single. When you're single all you have to worry about is serving Christ and growing your relationship with Him. Once you're married, as the last verse reference states you have someone else to worry about as well. Don't let single life slip by. That was one thing I was definitely convicted about. Yes, at times there may be a guy I like and yes, there will be times when it will drive me nuts wondering if he likes me and if we'll end up together and all those questions that come along with it. But I would HATE to not have utilized my freedom, and missed out on being all I can be when it comes to my walk.
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